Love in the Time of Quarantine

30 March 2020

I haven't written a blog post in 3 weeks. When Coronavirus, self-isolation, lockdowns, and quarantine are all anyone seems to be talking about it's difficult to know what to write about. I hate adding to the noise. I know my opinion means nothing in the grand scheme of things. This global situation is so much bigger than me. But to just write another happy book review as if nothing is happening didn't seem right either.

As someone who studies history in school, it's crazy to think about how everything that's happening will be dissected and discussed in history classes for the next several hundred years to come. It's the historian in me that has to leave some documentation, my own primary account of this event, even if it is just for my own catharsis.

2020 started off as such a good year. I was so sure that it would be the best year I have had in a long time. I had so many milestones coming up. I was getting ready to graduate college. I was looking forward to walking out of my last class, my last final, and finally across a stage to get my diploma. I was planning my wedding, preparing for all the new beginnings that come with getting married. I had so many hopes and dreams wrapped up in this year. And all of a sudden they were stolen from me in just a few short days.

I cannot express how incredibly unfair it feels to have this formative time in my life so drastically changed. Everything is coated in uncertainty, and it's been difficult. I feel selfish admitting it because I know everyone has been affected in one way or another. I don't want to pretend like I'm special. Everyone is suffering. But I still can't help but take it personally.

I feel paralyzed by all the differing opinions and perspectives. I can't bring myself to listen to the news anymore with the death toll rising and more and more events are being canceled. I can't get myself to plan for anything when I don't know if there will be ever a sense of normalcy again. I don't know what's going to happen. As a strong enneagram type 6, this whole situation is bringing out the most unhealthy parts of me. But I know there will be an end eventually.

My favorite part about studying history is to see just how resilient human beings can be when facing unimaginable trials. There have been so many times when people believed the world was ending, or that they would never make it through a hard time. There have been countless accounts of famines, plagues, and wars. But every time we have been able to rise up and overcome the darkness. There are tragedies, but it's never stopped people from learning, growing, and finding the beauty in the world again.

I have found comfort in the fact that God's hand is on history. He is never surprised by anything that has or will happen. It can be easy to fall into anger that He would allow this all to happen. However, I know He knows so much more than I ever will. He has shown time and time again that He is kind in all things. Already I can see how He is using this to draw myself and others closer to Him, and for that I am thankful.

I am also thankful for the sense of community we can still have through the internet. Social media gets a lot of heat, but I cannot imagine going through this all fifty years ago. I'm thankful I can finish school on time despite everything changing. I'm thankful I can still write and read. I'm thankful for a home and a family to turn to. I'm thankful that I'm not alone.

This post is a mess, but I hope, more than anything, that you can find a sense of calm and peace in this storm. We will see the other side.
"The Lord is my strength and my shield; in Him my heart trusts, and I am helped; my heart exults, and with my song I give thanks to Him." --Psalm 28:7


  1. We will see it to the other side.
    I know it.
    I believe it.
    I don't always feel it but that doesn't make it any less than true.

  2. I appreciate your vulnerability writing about this crazy time! It's very difficult and I'm sorry that it's converging at a really important time in your life. But you're right, none of this has been a surprise to our God and there is comfort in that. I hope that you are able to rest and read and spend time connecting with your family! <3

    1. Thank you so much for your sweet encouragement, Erin. I hope the same for you!

  3. To God be the Glory! Thank you for writing this, Hannah. It feels like all our plans for this year has been paused and I honestly don't even know how things will pan out or if it will ever be the same. I admire your openness and honesty; I resonate with it too at this time. Let's continue to draw closer to the Lord and to trust in His promises and goodness. Sending virtual hugs!

    Anna Jo |

    1. Thank you so much, Anna Jo. Your comment speaks so much truth and means so much! <3

  4. I am so so sorry about all the disappointments you’re facing, Hannah. 2020 was supposed to be the year I flew, and now, well. . .it’s not. “There’s still time,” I tell myself. “the year isn’t over yet.” But I’m a hard person to convince. : )

    I’m so glad you wrote this because it gives me the chance to say, “Hang in there. You’ve got this.”

    sending hugs.

    1. Thank you for all the love and encouragement, Keira! It means so much. I'm sorry for all of your disappointments too. But I know when this passes you'll get the chance to fly and travel and I can't wait to hear all about it.